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Two Sentence Stories

Big Stories in Two Little Sentences

Category: Two Sentence Stories

Retriever

Golden retriever my ass.
Where is my pirate treasure, dog?

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Rating: 9.3/10 (3 votes cast)
Author adminPosted on December 11, 2019Categories Two Sentence StoriesTags Dog, PirateLeave a comment on Retriever

Palm reader

Shake my hand.
Now turn it over and read your future.

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Rating: 8.0/10 (1 vote cast)
Author adminPosted on December 11, 2019Categories Two Sentence StoriesTags futureLeave a comment on Palm reader

Date

Later I realised I could have read out fortune cookies and you still would have thought we were having a conversation.
Looking forward to the next date!

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Rating: 7.0/10 (6 votes cast)
Author adminPosted on December 10, 2019Categories Two Sentence StoriesTags conversation, date, loveLeave a comment on Date

Expiry

As soon as I paid for the six-pack of doomsday devices I knew I had made a big mistake.
I used like … three and then the rest just sat in the cupboard until I tossed them out, months past their expiry dates.

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Rating: 6.0/10 (2 votes cast)
Author adminPosted on December 9, 2019Categories Two Sentence StoriesTags doomsday, MistakeLeave a comment on Expiry

Plans

Stroke your fingers over the crackling plans and marvel at their hubris.
They shall build the most evil house ever!

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Rating: 6.0/10 (1 vote cast)
Author adminPosted on December 9, 2019Categories Two Sentence StoriesTags evil, hubris, plansLeave a comment on Plans

Saturn

You were not my Sun or my Earth.
You weren’t even my Saturn.

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Rating: 4.2/10 (5 votes cast)
Author adminPosted on December 9, 2019Categories Two Sentence StoriesTags love, relationshipLeave a comment on Saturn

Work

At work I always tell the truth.
I’ve been fired like three times.

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Rating: 6.3/10 (4 votes cast)
Author adminPosted on December 8, 2019Categories Two Sentence StoriesTags fired, truth, workLeave a comment on Work

Knees

She used to get down on her knees a lot.
Not for praying.

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Rating: 8.4/10 (5 votes cast)
Author adminPosted on December 7, 2019Categories Two Sentence StoriesTags prayer, sexLeave a comment on Knees

Phone

That super-duper awesome new phone you have?
It’s still only going to ring as much as the old one.

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Rating: 9.0/10 (2 votes cast)
Author adminPosted on December 7, 2019Categories Two Sentence StoriesTags phoneLeave a comment on Phone

Wife

My wife is made of folded paper.
I love her creases.

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Rating: 9.0/10 (5 votes cast)
Author adminPosted on December 6, 2019Categories Two Sentence StoriesTags love, paper, wifeLeave a comment on Wife

Cake

Let us bake a cake.
A cake of doooooooommmmmm!

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Rating: 5.5/10 (2 votes cast)
Author adminPosted on December 5, 2019Categories Two Sentence StoriesTags cake, doomLeave a comment on Cake

View

What if aliens turn up and see that almost everything on this planet kills and consumes other things to survive?
What if they look at us with the same disgust we view cannibals?

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Rating: 0.0/10 (0 votes cast)
Author adminPosted on December 5, 2019Categories Two Sentence StoriesTags cannibal, planetLeave a comment on View

Meaning

After three hours of meditating I divined a glimpse of deep and profound meaning.
I was kinda hungry a little too, not starving, but I coulda definitely had a snack of some kind.

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Rating: 5.0/10 (1 vote cast)
Author adminPosted on December 5, 2019Categories Two Sentence StoriesTags food, meaningLeave a comment on Meaning

Charmour

Before heading out to pick up girls I put on my charmour.
It’s so … shiny and big … they love it.

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Rating: 5.5/10 (2 votes cast)
Author adminPosted on December 5, 2019Categories Two Sentence StoriesTags girlsLeave a comment on Charmour

Wish

I went to the well and wished for true love.
Then I saw a guy in this awesome rocket-powered time machine with mega lasers and I think I wasted my wish.

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Rating: 7.8/10 (5 votes cast)
Author adminPosted on December 4, 2019Categories Two Sentence StoriesTags lasers, love, time machine, wishLeave a comment on Wish

Hat

I dropped a hat as I made a quick decision.
Later I would say I made it ‘at the drop of a hat’.

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Rating: 7.5/10 (2 votes cast)
Author adminPosted on December 4, 2019Categories Two Sentence StoriesTags decision, HatLeave a comment on Hat

Ballerina

The ballerina leapt.
She still couldn’t reach the sky.

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Rating: 10.0/10 (2 votes cast)
Author adminPosted on December 3, 2019Categories Two Sentence StoriesTags ballerina, skyLeave a comment on Ballerina

Wife

My wife thought she knew me.
So funny what people think.

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Rating: 6.6/10 (63 votes cast)
Author adminPosted on December 3, 2019Categories Two Sentence StoriesTags funny, wifeLeave a comment on Wife

iPod

The kids you raise may one day choose your nursing home.
That is why I deserve an iPod for my birthday.

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Rating: 7.9/10 (7 votes cast)
Author adminPosted on December 2, 2019Categories Two Sentence StoriesTags children, ipod, parentsLeave a comment on iPod

Invitation

Tia tried out many invitations to boys over the years.
The most successful: come conquer me.

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Rating: 5.8/10 (10 votes cast)
Author adminPosted on December 1, 2019Categories Two Sentence StoriesTags invitation, love, sexLeave a comment on Invitation

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