We laughed and ate and drank and fucked and sighed and slept.
We connected on a deeper level and then, then we went to the zoo and watched a seal swim about.
Muscle Memory
Risking a go at post-coital conversation as he got up and walked out the room, Stan Huckjaw said to the woman whose name evaded him at the moment, “I’m gonna grab a sandwich and hit the shitter.” Somehow, he instinctively knew to flinch, even though the exclamation “Pig!” hit his ears no sooner than a four inch heel hit the back of his head.
Back to Nature
Phil could still remember the day he saw the first crack begin running up the living room wall of what he had once considered his dream home. It was about nine months later that he ran to the unused nursery in response to the screams of his wife, to find that two possums had moved into the box that still contained the never-assembled crib.
The Sixth Beatle?
There’s a peanut sitting there on the chair growing hair, because it wants to be a rock star someday.
If it puts on a pair of round spectacles, we’ll have to call him John Legume.
Environment
We chose business over the environment.
The environment really didn’t appreciate it.
Core values
We write so much about core values that I think people here actually believe it.
Reality tells the truth though.
The other kind of cat
Here pussy puss puss.
Calling out at the nightclub.
Answers
She knew all the answers.
Unfortunately, the only question she knew was ‘what goes with vanilla?’
List
Some of the things that happened were your fault, some weren’t.
No matter what, I’ve made a complete list and one day …
Chew The Ashes Of Life
Life’s a headache; a deep throbbing pain that’s not going to stop until you drop into your grave in the cold, cold ground.
Yet, even after all the years of tears, watching great men give in to their fears, we will still come back to do it all over again, gladly, if only time permits.
Fabric
The fabric of reality is not fabric.
It is goo.
my job
I looked for you in all the usual places; job agencies, friends of friends, publishing houses. Little did I know you lurked right there in front of me in my keyboard letters.
Cruel Twist
I had hung over the edge of the cliff. Now, I hang onto the memory of my rescuer twisting, flailing, falling in my place.
Talent
Talent is a poison.
Other people think it is great to make up all those stories but they don’t have to deal with the voices in the night.
Golfers Just Wanna Have Fun
I wouldn’t want to be in Tiger Woods’ shoes today.
He got caught playing eighteen holes with a single ball.
Dew
They called him a dew-hater.
Who hates little drops of water I thought.
Writer
Every year it gets a bit harder to say it with a straight face.
Hi, I’m Mat and I’m a writer.
Racism again
Do you have bok choy?
No, he doesn’t work here anymore.
Reason
A raisin is a dried grape.
A reason is also a dried grape.
Tomorrow is another day.
Multiple Sclerosis is not a fun disease, but luckily it is a slow one.
No known cause and no known cure…
..but research is the technical term for hope.