A man was interviewing for a job and the interviewer said, “In this job we need someone who is responsible.”
“I’m the one you want,” the man replied,”At my last job every time anything went wrong, they said I was responsible.”
Category: Competition
Competition
Life is a Highway
According to a song, life is a highway.So don’t get hit by a truck.
A man went to a zoo
A man went to a zoo with only one exhibit, a dog. It was a Shitzu.
Ol’ Factory
Smells of sweet hyacinth high in the air, and in your hair; of hemp shampoo, left me no choice but to forsake all twelve steps. Sometimes out of spite I like to forget about what’s best for me, in lieu of bringing out the worst in you.
The Perfect Girl
We’ve been together for a long time: we lay in the same bed at night, we bathe together, whenever she goes outside i follow her; i love her, she’s the perfect girl for me.
I wish I met her when I was still alive
The Plumber
He was a fireman and studying to be a plumber. He came over to fix my shower and after that was done, he showed me his hose.
War Form
We take significant measures to avoid contact with alien flesh or silicon. In matters involving serious conflict we rain asteroids on worlds.
The Jump
While I was falling, my last thoughts were of Dr. Morrow and his quest for a miracle cure. Now (as detached from life’s everyday struggles as one could be) the solution seemed obvious.
Unfaithful
I caught my husband having sex with the girl that lives down the road,today. The one girl he constantly complained that her boobs and ass were too big, he was repulsed by them and that he didnt understand why men would b attracted to her.
Two lost souls
Walking hand in hand through the glistening wet sand, as the water lapped at their feet the young couple did walk without a care in the world. Without warning the surge carried them far out to sea where they were together forever, just a memory of what could have been.
“Swish: Maria in the Mourning”
“Her spirit left in that ambulance. Did she rise up to see Jake working on her frantically and thank him as a final irony before she went away?”
Lust
Whenever John walks past me,i catch my breath. Whenever he walks past John, John catches his breath.
Deep
I always think you should slow down and enjoy life. But when I do, I can’t.
Relationships
You said you loved me and promised that we would be together forever. Now you’re moving to New York for college; what happened to your promise?
Reality
Success has different meaning to each individual. Nurture your mind with great thoughts, for you will never go any higher than you think.
the big fight
once, there was a brawl between mr. a.p. test and mr. senior itis. guess who won.
She Gets The Last Laugh
Sadly, she laid the two-carat diamond band on the table in front of him. She kissed his cheek and whispered in his ear, ‘I pawned the real one ten years ago, dear, this one is as fake as our marriage was.’
Photograph
This exact moment in time and arrangement of scenery captured through the lens of the camera by the simple click of a button will soon be lost and unattainable. There’s always reminiscence.
Lone Bride
The lone bride gazed down on her tear-soaked white gown, knowing her fiance would not return to the chapel. Sighing in acceptance and defeat, she began the long walk home.
Heart Shatter
My wife, whose love and devotion means more to me than anything else in the world, is due to have our first child in August. Today I found out I’m sterile.