If you’ve got a day off tomorrow like me then I’ve got a totally awesome idea for us!
Let’s all work on our manifestos together!
Category: Two Sentence Stories
Lend it
We launched an epic war of conquest and years later we returned home, bloody but victorious.
Next time we ask to borrow a cup of sugar, just lend it ok?
Paper
This paper belongs to four strangers (they all got off at different stations). Ink-strained and alone, but at least it got a free ride.
– Tom Burns
Night
At night, everything comes to life.
Watch out for the toaster!
Banker
Driving home, I made up the most incredibly cool rap song.
Unfortunately there’s no paper and pens in the car so I guess I’ll just have to stay being a banker.
Friends
I know we just met but let me just say straight up that I think we’ll make awesome online friends.
We’ll have to stop seeing each other in real life of course.
Taught
We have taught each other so much in the time we’ve spent together.
You’ve taught me about love and hope and justice and I’ve taught you about lentils and parachute pants and how to fold little paper dogs out of any spare scrap you find.
Clouds
I shall turn on the hot water tap.
And there shall be clouds.
Trouble coming
As the pieces rolled down the assembly lines I think I saw the construction robots pause just a little.
If they understand they are building ConstructorBotV2.5 then I think we’ve got trouble coming.
Quantum
Quantum physics tells us that two particles can entangle and then act as one, miles apart, simultaneously.
I wish other stuff was Quantum.
Author
After all my years in poverty I decided to get real and expose myself.
Now I’m rich, shivering and cold and wishing I could take it all back.
Soluable
A fact: people are soluble in water.
Eventually.
Puppet
You can be a puppet with strings or a puppet with a hand up your ass.
Things they never tell you about adult working life.
Trail
Your detritus is spread from one side of the web to another.
Clean up your trail, I’m sick of finding traces of you.
Abandon
I thought I had an endless supply of slim gold bars of love to hand around with reckless abandon.
Imagine my surprise to turn up to my warehouse to find it sold, a dingy coffee-house in its place.
Malfunction
There was a terrible malfunction on the flight, everything went black and I ended up here.
I’m covered in blood, screaming and I’ve got the terrible feeling I’m going to have to go through puberty again.
Baker
After the gingerbread man came to life do you think the baker made another?
Did he make himself a wife?
Charity
We made the biscuits and shipped them off to those poor kids overseas.
We made love and thought highly of ourselves.
Cake
Your God-cake is not bad.
“Every slice is a trip to Heaven” is a little bit too much though.
Naked
I didn’t lie to my wife about the night out.
I mean, they’re not really strippers if they arrive naked, right?