The Breakup

The photographer showed one of her works to her lover and asked what he thought the people portrayed in it were like. She quietly walked out a few moments after he—feeling flustered and taken off guard—replied, “I don’t think photographs can tell you anything.”

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Bad Move

On their first and only date, he tried to compliment her, “I wish I’d met you twenty-five years ago, because, you know, you’re pretty now and all; but you probably could’ve stopped traffic then.”

She narrowed her eyes and cocked her head to the side as if examining him and then replied, “I can’t tell about you—were you ever attractive?”

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Pride and Prejudice

Before boarding the train to a beach town, I once laughed heartily at a guy with oversized glasses and over-gelled hair. Weirdly, on the evening train back into town, he attempted a Back Street Boys’ medley in broken English and somehow won me over to the idea of sharing a gelato.

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The Right Fit

She dated around for years, and there were guys she probably would’ve married if things had gone differently, if they had stuck around long enough to ask. It wasn’t until Boyfriend #63 that she realized what a mistake and a misery that would have been and what she would have missed out on by settling.

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