He was so high on waiting that he didn’t even move when it started raining.
We called the ambulance and waited nearby, trying not to get too high on the delay.
Butterfly
I killed the butterfly.
That should teach the rest about making those damn hurricanes all the time.
Harmacy
I went to the harmacy and got some medicine.
It made me worse.
The Fall
He was at the top of the roof when he fell, rolled down the shingles into the gutter that ran around the roofline; then blackness as he fell further.
Coming out of the dark after the long fall, he felt the others around him who had fallen, as they joined together to became a flood of water pouring out of the downspout, into the light.
Upon reflection
Staring at him, I was mesmerized by the chiseled features, the GQ magazine good looks with the long aquiline nose, piercing blue eyes, full, generous mouth with sparkling white teeth, and indeed the handsomest man I’d ever seen.
Ahhhh, thank heaven for mirrors!
Ant people
Once, for fun, I picked up the phone and dialled a number that was like 30 digits long.
A woman from 2204 answered, made some cryptic remark about ant people and then the phone went dead.
Blessed
I blessed you with goodness and mercy.
What those other two fairy godmothers blessed you with for you to turn out like that I’ll never know.
Meek
Great, so the world belongs to the meek.
What the fuck am I going to do with my jumbo-mega-destructor laser cannons now?
Agreement
The agreement between us was quite clear.
We may kiss anywhere except on the mouth.
Cookie
Stealing your cookie and gulping it down is one of my favourite memories.
I’ve replayed it so many times it is getting thin and fading away.
Online
During one drunken night I went online and must have bought all kinds of stuff because I keep getting packages in the mail now.
Why exactly did I join the Ham of the Month club?
Soul
I don’t have a soul.
I have a bunch of neurons working together, creating me minute by minute.
I Need Help
My addiction grows stronger every day, the desire to indulge in it intense, to the point where I can’t sleep without dreaming of it, can’t get through the day without thinking of it, can’t hold a conversation without it swirling in my head, begging me to do it “just one more time,” and one more “just one more time” ad nauseum.
Please tell me, is there a rehab for Two Sentence Story writers?
Botty
I don’t know what is wrong with robot dog.
Perhaps we should stop calling him botty.
Urban Myth
“Dude, this is like those stories where someone finds a Kentucky Fried mouse or a thumb in a can of pop!”
“I don’t think that analogy applies when you find a head in a freezer.”
Delusion
I’ve been suffering under a delusion.
A delusion of adequacy.
Decisive
When i was younger, i rode a bike without brakes down a hill, and swerved into a bush before i reached the main road.
Now i am older, i ride the same bike,for different reasons, and swerve into the same bush, for different reasons.
Slipped
Every year I returned to the exact same spot and waited, hoping you’d arrive.
I’m sorry my finger slipped when I was setting the date in the time machine.
Limping
I’m limping because last night I stood on some shards of broken dreams.
They are scattered on my bedroom floor along with my self-respect, bottles of girlfriend tears and lost hopes crumpled and stained.
The chase
He had to get to the airport, he flew past an overturned red mini that had been cordoned off.
He decellerated,pulled over, and looked back at her helpless body lying on the tarmac.