Kenny had playfully tossed a bean bag at Mardibug, hitting her in the upper back. Mardibug knew she had no choice, really, but to retaliate with a fastball that replaced Kenny’s left eye with a blood-soaked bean bag.
My End has Come
When I look at the sun as it settles under the horizon, I feel the end has come and peace I shall find until the hour the sun rises. Just then I’ll be thrilled at the thought of the fresh unexplored time in front of these sleepy eyes of mine.
Think about it
I was so angry with what he was doing after all i had told him, all he knew. Then suddenly I realized i had done the exact same to him, and I was actually angry with myself.
Religious Addiction
When their parents’ marriage falls apart, some kids turn to drugs or promiscuous sex or self-cutting. She turned to church and, weirdly, made Jesus her opiate.
The importance of being moisturized
Leaving the house without applying lotion was, in the end, a terrible oversight. Because when she got to work, her face had peeled off from chin to forehead, just as she always said it would if she forgot to use her Mary Kay.
The Grisly Terror
The coroner felt suddenly uneasy as she opened the door to leave the room full of freshly dead corpses awaiting autopsy. Turning around slowly, her heart stood still at the sight of all ten cadavers sitting upright on their tables, black body bags still zipped over their mangled, reanimated remains.
OCD Torture
When he left the office, his desk was clean, free of clutter, almost pristine. Three days later his coworkers had managed to pile it high with files, random junk and their own personal belongings.
(strange) bedfellow
The bed sunk on his side when he threw back the sheets and stumbled toward the bathroom. Time passed, some indeterminable number of minutes in the thick fog of her unencumbered sleep, and the bed sunk again when he got back in bed, breathing hard, smelling sour, and feeling different when her hand brushed the stranger’s.
Scary Circus
Crazed clown goes on a murderous rampage.
Terrified children scurry away!
The Wake
Eight of them perched like grotesque leaves on the gnarled tree by the side of the road, and as Amy approached she began to regret the curiosity that had drawn her into the woods. Cradled in the skeletal roots of the tree lay the thing responsible for the congregation of flesh-eating birds: a bloated and rotting human corpse that was missing its face.
drinking, with or without company
With sarcasm dripping from every word, he said, “It’s good that you don’t drink at happy hour, when I’m the only one sipping on something stronger than Diet Coke with a lime wedge.”
“Getting good and hammered at happy hour is too expensive,” she replied, and chugged the rest of her wine.
Click Click, Bang Bang
The overweight, generously paid, and undertrained TSA Agent pulled the trigger on his brand new Glock 27 at the fleeing terrorist, hearing a deafening click. The terrorist, dressed in all black pseudo military garb, cooly turned and fired four rounds into Agent Paulson’s chest.
Death By Spring Cleaning
It was that time of year again, spring, and this year Pat was determined to cut down the apple tree that seemed to attract bees every year that gave him bad dreams. A few minutes with a reciprocating saw, a loud crack and a quick rustle as the branches fell to the ground was followed by the sound from Pats nightmares: thousands of bees bursting from their now grounded nest, attacking Pat in their rage and killing him within minutes.
Death Penalty for Sideburns
It was a big day, and he wanted to look his clean-shaven best. But now his sideburns were deceased, having been executed by overzealous experimentation and a hungry Mach3 razor.
Windowface and the vodka
It had to be the clear liquid burning, the vodka, that made that face appear in the blackness of the night outside the window. But it wasn’t, it wasn’t the vodka at all, because now the face was back, and now it wasn’t afraid to be seen — and yes, it looked angry.
Fantasy Baseball Child
I was asked to be a surrogate drafter for my friend’s fantasy baseball team. I’ll do that — I’ll take a couple hours and create the team — but I refuse to be there as it grows up, and breaks hearts, and teases, and disappoints.
It’s all fun and games until you’re partially eaten by housecats
Danny thought it was hilarious to joke that his cat Michael Myers had not eaten for a week. He found it less funny when Michael Myers ate most of his forehead later that day.
Scaffolding Nightmare
“What happened to the construction workers?” she asked. “They were decapitated by the barber’s scissors,” he replied.
Late Night
“It’s a beautiful rain outside. Would be perfect for movies, you lazybones” – i wrote her.
Secret Admirer
She looks so beautiful tonight. I wonder if she can see me.