We tell our kids the phantom footsteps are the house settling, that the tapping on their window is a tree branch in the wind. Now if we could just come up with a logical explanation for the chainsaw noise from the basement last night, or where our pesky neighbor disappeared to.
So many on this planet worry about alien attack, invasion and takeover. What we’ve never bothered to tell them is that we won’t waste resources that way; we won’t begin terraforming until their civilization has died off naturally, which will happen much sooner than most believe.
I tell everyone he died in the ocean after our plane crashed, and that I survived for two months on the island by hunting ‘sea birds and other small game.’ He really died about a month after we both swam to shore, and I hit him over the head with that rock so I could live off his remains until they found me.
I’ve been told millions of times that my smile is beautiful, but a little forced. Your smile would be forced too if you’d been stuck in a painting for five hundred years listening to people critique you.
I wish my boyfriends wouldn’t put me up on a pedestal so often. Especially when he leaves me chained there alone while he works all day.
My toilet clogged up again this morning. I hope it’s not the arm I flushed down there last week.
My twins, Mary Lou and Priscilla, were adopted as newborns and over the past five years I’ve watched them learn to walk, talk, ride bikes and otherwise blossom into beautiful, thriving children. The only problem I have is that the irritating people they call Mom and Dad always tell everyone their ‘birth mother’ died in the hospital.
I don’t know what’s more unsettling. The fact that my TV wakes me up at night or the fact that it’s unplugged at night.
As I pushed my thumbs into her eye sockets, it occurred to me that my cheating husband may have been right.
It was amazing to feel her from the inside.
She heard a noise and locked the door. Little did she know she locked whatever it inside with her.
I felt the hands inside my pocket scratching my belly while I gazed the sunset alone. Those were not my hands.
I heard a knocking at the door one time. It was certainly strange, since I no longer had ears.
The temptation of exploring an old haunted house alone , where strange things happened to people and against my best friend’s wishes ,was too hard to resist. After spending a night there when I proudly came out to announce to my friend that nothing in the house had changed since last night , I found her screaming hysterically , the house hadn’t changed , I had !!
Ever spotted something out of the corner of your eye with the suspicion that someone was watching you? Ever seen half of a face staring back?
I should have known right from the beginning that there was something wrong with the deserted diner especially after ordering their special steak. The meat tasted strange , the waitress was staring continuously at me with a perpetual smile on her face & a butchers knife sticking out of her apron.
At first i thought it was coming from the window.
But then i heard the tapping come from the mirror again.
At 26 years old is it weird that I find nothing more comfortingn than my mother’s touch? You may find it weirder that when died giving birth to me.
We hid it in the basement when I started having nightmares. Standing outside my room, a doll never looked so lifelike.
I wasn’t afraid of the noises until I noticed. At night, the nurses came in pairs.
“Honey, are you back yet?” I ask, as the living room door opens behind me. Someone appreciatively whispers “No…” into my ear.