Hypothesis Denied

“You know, I was bothered by you at first, but then I thought to myself gee, if someone claims to hate me that much, well, then it must just be they’re intimidated by me, so is that it – are you intimidated by me?”
“No, trust me – honest to God, I just genuinely hate you.”

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He was often heard lamenting his metabolism and the fact that he could not lose weight. Yet it was difficult for people to make out exactly what he was saying, since this often occurred while his mouth was full of fried green tomatoes.

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