Big Stories in Two Little Sentences
The day they had betrothed themselves to one another, Gabe was inebriated, having taken a handful of the little blue pills he had grown to adore more than even his next meal or breath.
So this unfortunate ending, sitting across from the love of his life signing papers issued by her attorney, The Great Neuterer, seemed the fitting finale to the union he had taken for granted for the last time.
Will the me of ten years hence look back and grimace?
I bet he’ll not like “hence” sitting there like a clod.
The lady whose son almost drowned said “of course it was a mother’s worst nightmare”.
As soon as she said it I wondered if she had had that one with the box puppets, the creeping dark and the man rolling the stone across the endless cold marble.
He stood there staring at her patiently, watching her eyes dart from side to side, up and down, her face a beautiful study in motion, from frowns to slight smiles, to perplexed, to curiosity, and back to frowning again at the object in her hand.
Finally, his feet growing sore and his patience growing thinner, he asked her, “Have you decided on your order yet M’am?”
Each adult has a button connected to sex marked “hostile to the world”.
If it’s not pressed every few months or so, watch out.
Sometimes I think the only point of us being together was for me to give you a word and a little game that you’ll play with your kids.
And that will be the only thing I contribute to the world.
While the boy with sticking-out ears, we all call “wing nuts”, winds the Silky Oak “Herga & Co of Brisbane” school clock, he places one of his wing nuts against the clock and straightens it so it goes “tick – tick” and not “tick – tock”. If it went tick – tock it would go slower and slower until it eventually stopped.
Your birthday passed on by and I pretended not to really think about it.
But I could think of nothing else.
All my friends say it will get better.
And I say it’s a soufflé – this is as good as it gets.
Downed, again, amidst all the rush and tumble, the trash and the defeat. Everything I ever wanted was lost, and then I saw you again, and started again, because that is what you do to me.
The knight kept bravely challenging the dragon and riding around in front of his cave, until he was unexpectedly knocked unconscious.
“Chauvinist,” the princess said, putting down her mace, “Like I needed rescuing!”
Hey, want to know another secret?
It’s really hard to make new friends without drinking.
Actions may speak louder than words, but words will always influence actions.
Words can make you cry, laugh or even sing with joy, which is why we must never forget them.
I love it when we lie babe!
I wuv you too!
Walking into the kitchen today I had a flash of blinding inspiration.
I’m not sure the inspiration – we’re all fucked – was worth my vision.
I refused the news.
Give me the olds, I said.
It was only later we realised how weird it was.
We had all called him tumour-head years before he actually got head cancer.
I woke up this morning with the head of a jelly-baby in my bed.
When the ant mafia want something, give it to them.
I used to wonder why you didn’t tell me what happened to you when you were young.
Then I realised it was because you could not withstand my pity.
The football team called her peanut butter.
Kind of an odd name for such a friendly girl don’t you think?