They say you shouldn’t stuff your face when you’re stressed because the fat will long outlast your worries, but really it’s the other way around. If only we were able to crap out and flush away the stress as easily the next day!
“Sweetie, what on EARTH are you doing?” Claire asked, beyond surprised to see Chelsea, her pig-tailed, freckle-cheeked, pink-shorts-wearing four year-old daughter, hopping repeatedly on one foot for balance while jamming the other down the toilet, two dandelions grasped in one hand while the other worked the flushing lever.
“Well we bringed flowers to Grampa in the hospital yesterday, so now I’m gonna bring flowers to Bubbles,” Chelsea answered matter-of-factly, of course referring to her comrade who had, several weeks ago after a violent incident involving one of his (larger and more aggressive) bowl-mates, been sent via toilet flush to the fishy hospital.
Close the toilet door and close your mouth.
I don’t want to see you piss and I don’t want to hear you talk shit, darling.