Testing one’s patience

“Ok, class,” the tired and exasperated teacher intoned to the rowdy 8th graders sitting before him, some tossing spitballs at one another, you will now take one of the most critical tests of the year, but before you start, it’s important that you pay attention to the instructions: Take a plain sheet of ruled paper and print your name in the upper right corner, making sure it is legible, because if it isn’t I will trash can it, along with your Mod number, and the date, then begin by writing the question, followed by your answer, all questions and answers to be written with a #2 pencil, no open books, no talking, no getting out of your chair for any reason, no asking me questions, especially silly ones, for any reason,no asking to go to the bathroom or if you can sharpen your pencil or asking if this test counts, just begin the test Now!”

“Yo, Mr. Smith, could you repeat that please?”

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Timmy wadded the tissue up, licked it, stuffed it through the straw, and blew.

Travis eyes followed the wad up to the ceiling where several other spit wads clung. “Cool…” he said, briefly forgetting about the old woman pushing a grocery shopping cart in the down stairs bathroom.

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old woman

I watched a thin, very old woman with jet black hair and a bright red hooded fleece pushing a rickety baby carriage with a pet rabbit in it. And just for a moment I had a sense of what it must feel like to be Tim Burton.

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To have the untamable curiosity of a cat would offer a life so compelling. All of the humdrum, commonplace things turn entrancing and the daily grind is now intriguing.

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Great Honour

The son of an old wretched woman got jailed yesterday for farting in the public where at the same time the tension danced spirally through my bowels and I felt the disgracing element moving towards my anus. I blew it and laughed, paid a bulky bribe and got honoured (OFR).

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