Thinking with his genitalia had gotten Crispin Snatscatcher in trouble many a time. Though none of his planetary invasions had proven fatal thus far, most of the habitable worlds in the galaxy were teeming with unviable mutants that were the results of his, shall we say, alien encounters.

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A Fable of Sorts

Somewhat disoriented after waking up in a strange hotel room after his first night in town, Belson Crandle could not remember where he put his shoes. He finally found them in the ice bucket, newly polished and filled with vanilla pudding and dead mice.

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The ongoing battle with the neighbours has become a war of attrition.
They took out our toaster with a surgical strike, we cut off their communications with the destruction of their letterbox and soon, soon my friends, we will invade their lounge and end this for once and all.

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