Cat Sitting

She didn’t like going to her neighbor’s house, 3 doors down, because there were no streetlights with the trees casting a frightening shadow under the moon’s light, and it was always deathly silent on their street, but they had asked her to feed their cats while they were gone for two days, so with trepidation she approached the door, only to hear a sudden, terrifyingly, booming roar, followed by vicious growling, a man’s commanding voice, and bright lights flashing in the bedroom.

After she recovered from her shock, and still clutching her chest where her heart would be if it hadn’t fallen down to her stomach, she remembered that they leave Animal Planet on the television for their cats!

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To have the untamable curiosity of a cat would offer a life so compelling. All of the humdrum, commonplace things turn entrancing and the daily grind is now intriguing.

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Bad Seed

In order to stop my four-year-old son from swearing, I told him that with every curse a fluffy kitten dies. Our back garden is now littered with tiny graves, but the boy has got to learn about consequences.

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Chelsea, Tabitha, and Mrs. Renfrew

“I’ll never be married,” mused the middle-aged woman as she sipped on free champagne and watched with shameful bitterness as a toddler in a tuxedo chased a group of newborn ducks. “I’m going to become one of those angry spinsters who’s mean to children and gives her cats people names.”

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Rating: 6.5/10 (13 votes cast)